23 Oktober 2011

....atau 24 Oktober yak? Jam tangan ketinggalan, hape metong, gak ada jam dinding.

The Three Musketeers
MU 1 v 6 City
QPR 1 v 0 Chelsea

wohaa, biasanya saya akan melontarkan ejekan ke teman-teman pendukung MU abis itu...ih wow, serinya liverpool lawan tim promosi jadi terlupakan aja loh, headline di semua media pasti jugak tentang 'a n16ht to remember'..xixixi, hari apa lagi cobak yang lebih membahagiakan dari ini?





but all of a sudden the headline itself was replaced by another lovely thing.

You.

Love is a Laserquest

do you still feel younger than you thought you would by now?
or, darling, have you started feeling old yet?
don't worry, i'm sure that you're still breaking hearts
with the efficiency that only youth can harness
and do you still think love is a laserquest?
or do you take it all more seriously?
i've tried to ask you this in some daydreams that i've had
but you're always busy being make-believe
and do you look into the mirror to remind yourself you're there?
or have somebody's good-night kisses got that covered?

when i'm not being honest, i'll pretend that you were just some lover
now i can't think of there without thinking of you
i doubt that comes as a surprise
and i can't think of anything to dream about
i can't find anywhere to hide
and when i'm hanging on by the rings around my eyes
and i convince myself i need another
and for a minute it gets easier to pretend that you were just some lover

when i'm pipe and slippers and rocking chair
singing dreadful songs about something
will i've found a better method of pretending you were just some lover?
will i've found a better method of pretending you were just some lover?

I know it's kinda lame to post lyrics at this entry, but since Alex Turner can't just stop making me swoon, I'm just gonna pretend that he wrote the abovementioned specifically for me. Click THIS if you want a listen. Happy birthday to me by the way.. :*

old story

"i don't know how to say this correctly...but i should..."

"then just say.."

"you gotta hate me for this..i know.."

"so why hesitate? you have prepared yourself for the worst, haven't you?"

"hey..why are you so.. *sigh* fine, i met someone else.."

"..and you think she's the one. oh, of course i know."

"you know? how? did anyone tell you?"

"oh come on. for the last three months you've been very much out of reach. you didn't call me very often no more, hung up my call at certain times ,and didn't reply my text. you forgot your promises over and over again and blamed it on your freaking study!"

"why didn't you break up with me anyway?"

"i'm waiting for you, from the very first hand, to stand up and tell me right away, you jerk! and it took you such a long time to do that!"

"but you could just do it any time."

"and it's enough of a proof to tell me how coward you are. i need no formality or long goodbye, if that's what you intend to. thank you for calling."

that is how it was supposed to be that day, 3 years ago. everytime i look back on the day when i should say "of course i know..." i can't help but hold my fist. you never did know that i was burst into tears later on, right? that i never ever figured out before that you were betraying me. that i was too angry to listen to any of your words so i hung up the phone so sudden. that i never thought it would happen. that i just couldn't stop thinking how naive i was.

i wonder if you ever thought of me like i did back then. i wonder if you ever loved me as much as i did. because if you did, you would find it hard to let me go, wouldn't you? but you didn't.. it all seemed too easy. i recall the time when we had this daily nonsensical conversation late at night, made some laughable stories and imagined things like wild creatures, aliens, UFOs... oh how good you were at words. i commanded myself to stop staring and waiting for anything from you popping up my screen, thus encouraged myself so hard not to reply your text and return your calls.

but then again... i remember you sang Hey There Delilah to me on the phone when i first arrived in Jakarta. your singing that mostly sucks big time all of a sudden sounded good. i don't know why, and i had no idea what song it was, so i just said 'thank you, it was good'. i didn't lie, you know. it hit me at the right place, being for the numerous times far away from you i found it comforting, consoling, and i felt loved by you. blimey, i never thought it would be the last time.

"after all you put me through, you'd think i'd despise you. but in the end i wanna thank you, cause you've made me that much stronger..."

few days ago, i don't know from whom you got my cellphone number since i was too surprised to hear from you again. finally, after all these years we both talked and shared several stories, and by the way you spoke, you sounded a bit nervous. i don't feel anything at all, if you believe. i've lost that kinda feeling so long ago - in fact, the thing that we did back then only reminds me of the innocence of my youth - i am so glad, and well, you should :)

in a mood of love songs, anyone?

The anticipated Valentine's Day is coming right away (by the time this blog is posted it may have passed - well yeah, totally) and everywhere I went there were cakes, chocolates, balloons, cute gifts, etc. Alright, since I don't fancy celebrating that kind of thing (no, seriously, besides the religion issue, V-Day is such a joke) I'm thinking of writing a list - numbers of love songs which I find enchanting, touching, and moving.

What? I'm not being pathetic. The issue here is lately I find myself hating almost everything. The ticking clock, the desktop background, the scale, the traffic, the biological clock, the watch, I become frustrated each day because I ain't got nothing to do and I grow tired of this routine. I used to enjoy karaoke that muucccchhhh but now I'm done - I mean, everyone can still ask me out for that but the microphone doesn't turn me on as it used to. See, I run out of things to do, why not complain?

I don't dig classic love songs taken from Evergreen series - bleh, they're totally overplayed and lack of emotions. I mean, sometimes they consist of too much of a worshipping images of lovers and how hurt is being broken-hearted. I'm thinking of something simply eloquent and more of my taste - ha! that's what my blog's all about. Love songs should be emotional, but not too much. Serene yet meaningful. It doesn't make you cry a river but you can almost sense the need to. It is something that moves your heart and cuts it into pieces. Mehh.. I'll tell you what they are.

The Blower's Daughter - Damien Rice

knock-out lyrics: "I can't take my eyes off of you" repeatedly sung by his rasp of a voice...huh..dramatic..

overall: IMO, this song is about how easy it is to fall in love, there's just no reason needed, and it's so damn hurt to even let it go.

Something - The Beatles

knock-out lyrics: something in the way she moves / attracts me like no other lover //

overall: how can i say, i've always loved George Harrison. ada yang bilang lagu ini diciptakan buat istrinya saat itu (Pattie Boyd) dan liriknya memang bertutur tentang that special feeling. every songs would be the greatest song ever if it's written by one of the Beatle. this is on top, classic.

Layla - Eric Clapton

knock-out lyrics: "Please don't say we'll never find a way, or tell me all my love's in vain"

overall: Eric Clapton naksir sama istrinya George Harrison, dan membuatkannya lagu ini. that damn lucky girl Pattie Boyd! got it?

And I Love Her - The Beatles

knock-out lyrics: "I give her all my love, that's all I do. And if you saw my love, you'd love her too. I love her."

overall: love anthem dari The Beatles. lirik mereka simpel sekali, tanpa metafora apa-apa. saya pikir, yah, memang mencintai tak harus bertele-tele kan, bikin puisi yang niatnya puitis tapi kehilangan koherensi. *ngelirik lagu cinta masa kini*

Truly Madly Deeply - Savage Garden

knock-out lyrics: "I want to stand with you on a mountain, I want to bathe with you in the sea. I want to lay like this forever, until the sky falls down on me."

overall: cheesy, gombal, nggilani, norak.. ahhh tapi kalo digoda pake lagu ini kok masih lumer aja.. loh, curhat?

I Won't Spend Another Night Alone - The Ataris

knock-out lyrics: "out of every girl I meet, no other can compete. I'd ditch 'em all for a night with you"

overall: cheesy no.2. sori deh, selera pribadi, tapi somehow saya kepikiran untuk memasukkan lagu ini di acara pernikahan saya nanti, hehehe.

With or Without You - U2

knock-out lyrics: "you gave it all but I want more"

overall: hatiku sampai tersayat-sayat. ooohh.. intinya mungkin too much love will kill you yak. agak ngarang sih but I just can't explain really well what could be the meaning of "I can't live with or without you". being with someone you love is such a pain, but to be without has the same price, no?

Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's

knock-out lyrics: "if you get lonely, give this song another listen. close your eyes, listen to my voice - it's my disguise, i'm by your side"

overall: a girl left the town to continue her study and her boyfriend wrote a song for her. true story. lucky you Delilah, most of the guys I know will end up writing songs like Yank by Wali.

Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol

knock-out lyrics: "I don't quite know how to say how I feel. Those three words are said too much, they're not enough. "

overall: deep. every words I write won't be enough then.

You're Beautiful - James Blunt

knock-out lyrics: "I saw your face in a crowded face, and I don't know what to do"

overall: there's just something I can relate this song to myself. how many times do you feel that way, catch a glimpse of beautiful faces and instantly fall in love but it just goes nowhere? you don't get a chance to know his/her name and address (unless you are Rahma Azhari) but once it happened, time just stops and starts again in an extra speed to catch up.

Cornerstone - Arctic Monkeys

knock-out lyrics: "tell me where's your hiding place? I'm worried I'll forget your face. and I've asked everyone, I'm beginning to think I imagined you all along"

overall: truth be told, I'm so gonna get out of my hiding place and scream 'I'm here, Alex..'. keliatannya agak-agak mirip dengan You're Beautiful untuk dituliskan ulang, dalam versi kali ini ada seseorang yang desperately seeking someone he's longed for.

Walking After You - Foo Fighters

knock-out lyrics: "i cannot be without you, matter of fact i'm on your back. if you walk out on me, i'm walking after you."

overall: agak bikin bergidik. mulai masuk tahap berlebihan ini lagu.

I'll Kill Her - Soko

knock-out lyrics: all the lines, but i'll be kind to give you a sample: You were supposed to call me tonight / we'd have gone to the cinema// ...../ you were dating that bleached blonde girl / and if i find her, i swear i swear / i'll kill her, i'll kill her //

overall: hey, you know what to do if you find your girl singing this song, right?

Stay With Me - Shakespeare's Sister

knock-out lyrics: "in the silence of your room, in the darkness of your dreams, you must only think of me"

overall: yak, run! escape!

ooh, and I need to write down some of my friends' answers.

@sigitadhi Parachute - Cheryl Cole

Cute! Tapi bagian dimana dia bilang 'I don't need a parachute, you're gonna catch me if I fall' membuat saya membayangkan sosok pria bertubuh besar seperti balon dan perutnya mental-mental kayak trampolin. Turn-off.

@nasr_muhammad If You're Not The One - Daniel Beddingfield, When A Man Loves A Woman - Michael Bolton

aahhh, cukup jelas, lagu ini menggambarkan betapa payahnya pria kalo lagi jatuh cinta.

@onoirtnipi Thank You For Loving Me - Bon Jovi

jreng, hampir sama kayak diatas. but then again (saya sudah keliatan bosan menulis ya? maap)

Bon Jovi can do no wrong when it comes to cheesy love songs. no matter how cheesy it sounds, you'll categorize it very light one, forgiveable.

@aldreee Because You Loved Me - Celine Dion

oh, how good life would be when you found yer soulmate. thanks for reminding me.. to find one.

@ricky_____ Tell Me What You're Thinking - Say No More

ha, simple and sweet. it doesn't explain how the relationship is, whether they share the same affection or not. leave the options open, it could be both sides or just one, but it's just plain sweet.

El Nino!

I used to be a big fan of Fernand-who To**es, but let's say it's just one of a mild romanticism in the past. Now that he's gone to another English club, everything just doesn't feel okay. No, I won't bring him down, did we use to have wonderful times together, did we use to cheer and bounce everytime he scored? As Kenny Dalglish said: "Players come and go, but the club stands still". I just want to say good luck to him. Good luck on finally "joining a big club" and being on your way to win something! (oh wow, so we smashed the big club last night? i thought it was some of plastic clubs!)!

But well, just don't blame me on enjoying this motion picture though... XD

pictures above are from last night's game, Chelsea vs Liverpool that ended 0-1.

ode to my mom

i remember the moment when my father said a mouthful to his friends like a million times about my mother. she was a teacher, still young but left the job because my father urged her to do so not long after the marriage.

"i am the only one who will work and fulfill our needs, she just needs to take care of the house and our kids. i only ask her one thing, they must be able to read and write by the time they had gone to elementary school."

and she made it. no wonder he becomes so proud.

and i will always remember, she, along with her strong motherhood is also the one who helps build our house. you may need to know that my father didn't have so much money to pay labours, so most of the tasks were done by ourselves (excluded me, i was in Malang). she mixed and stirred cement, installed ceramic tiles, printed banners and covers of report card - her side job - and what i mean is, she is not the type of woman who will just sit beside her husband and smile, make him a cup of coffee and watch him work. she lends a hand, and out of her feminine side she is capable of doing anything needed. she is strong, you know, besides all the things abovementioned she still does most of household chores.. which makes me amazed.

i do not wish to be a merely housewife - she also doesn't want me to, but yes, being raised by a mother like her teaches me about what a good woman is made of.

happy mother's day everyone.


When you wake up in the mornin' baby look inside your mirror
You know I won't be next to you. You know I won't be near

I'd just be curious to know if you can see yourself as clear
as someone who has had you on his mind
(Mama, You Been On My Mind - Jeff Buckley)

i was a teenage anarchist..... (no, it's a title of the song)

I WAS A TEENAGE ANARCHIST
by AGAINST ME!
I was a teenage anarchist
Looking for a revolution
I had the style, I had the ambition
Read all the authors
I knew the right slogans
There was no war but the class war
I was ready to set the world on fire
I was a teenage anarchist
Looking for a revolution

Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire
Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire

I was a teenage anarchist
But the politics were too convenient
In the depths of their humanity
All I saw was bloodless ideology
With freedom as their doctrine
Guess who was the new authority
I was a teenage anarchist
But the politics were too convenient

Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire
Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire
When you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire

I was a teenage anarchist
But then the scene got too rigid
It was mob mentality
They set their rifle sights on me
Narrow visions of autonomy
You want me to surrender my identity
I was a teenage anarchist
The revolution was lie

Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire
Do you remember when you were young
And you wanted to set the world on fire
When you were young
And you wanted to set the world the fire
When you were young
And you wanted to set the world the fire

I was a teenage anarchist
I was a teenage anarchist
I was a teenage anarchist
I was a teenage anarchist

i'm working for Government's ministry.. a civil servant for sure and every end of year i'll be busier than i've ever been. that could be one out of many reasons i can give to answer why my blog has been this way, no longer updated. of course the reason number 1 is i have no idea what to write, life's been boring lately.. piles of works, papers, hoahm.

sometimes when i had time to think over my old days, i'll ask the same damn question.. what would i be if i didn't choose the path I chose? what would i pursue since i didn't really have any skills to be proud of? i know it just doesn't matter in the end, but lately, when i have to work on a paper i tend to arrange playlists to boost my mood, and that's when this video comes up playing and reminds me of my youth.

I Was A Teenage Anarchist by Against Me!, pretty much as the lyrics abovementioned, tells you about how your life has changed, from who you used to be to who you are now. it's like a nostalgic recall. some people said it was about Tom Gabel (the frontman)'s relationship with his music.. if you really listened to his previous materials, you'll recognize how significant the changes are. now they said he has abandoned his punk rock and indie roots ever since he signed to major label - ah, major label, why do they have to bother it so much? - I listen to Against Me! before they were big and I think their major album isn't that bad, yeah they've changed and maybe they want to broaden the horizons. it hurts seeing comments from those "fuck you! now you are consumers, not revolutionaries!"

but really, changes aren't all meant for something bad. in fact, that's the signal that you are growing up. i mean, you really think you are exactly the same person you were 10 years ago? are you sure you really want to start or be a part of revolution, or you're just a poser whose brain was fed by scenes, left-political opinions, issues, and conspiracy theories?

we are growing up. we have done a lot of things, we have learnt new ideologies, ideas, met a lot of people, and we are getting older, wiser, and smarter. I was familiar with stuffs like anti flag, the clash, against me, reading socialism zines, they taught me about capitalism, injustice, corrupted nations, and really.. have i told you for whom i am working for? well, i know it's contradictory listening to Anti-Flag's One Trillion Dollars when you are doing fiscal policies.. but really, why regret for being who you are right now? move on, it's not like the world has stopped and you can do nothing about it.